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Happy House: 4 Stressful Home Problems You Can Solve Without Anger

When family members are shouting at each other and no one is really listening, this type of communication is about as unhealthy as it gets. Unfortunately, this is how many families attempt to solve problems around the house, but this typically never gets them close to any real solutions to their problems. The following are some stressful home problems that lead to anger that can be addressed in more effective ways than to get angry and frustrated.

Your Teenager Stays Out Way Too Late

It is inconsiderate for your teenager to stay out past curfew, but yelling at them for it does not seem to be getting the point across. When all the yelling is over, they still got what they wanted and you are stuck with high blood pressure for your part. Some drama is not worth repeating. If your child is not home and inside by curfew, then simply lock them out. As a parent, there comes a time when anger is not the solution. Some problems are best dealt with by saying nothing at all and leaving your teenager to figure out how to deal with the prospect of being locked outside until they get the hint. Sometimes bold actions, free from the hostility of anger, will make far more of a statement with a broke teenager with nowhere to go than yelling at them ever will.

Fights Around The Dinner Table

The dinner table is often a place where shouting appears to be the norm, rather than the exception. Money, politics and the guy your daughter is dating will inevitably serve as fuel for the next heated discussion. To make matters worse, anger around the dinner table is horrible for digestion. For this reason, it is best to have a family policy of avoiding discussion topics at the dinner table that lead to an angry shouting match or worse. In fact, for best results, it is better to say little to nothing at all and reserve conversations for another time. Some gentle, relaxing music during dinner will help you avoid indigestion far easier.

Marital Problems

The one place anger does not belong is in the hurtful words that get passed between two people who claim to love each other. Yet, despite how much they talk about this love, it does not prevent the harsh words from coming out anyway when one or both partners feels like they were wronged in some way. Instead of stressing a marriage unnecessarily with angry words, it is generally best to take a moment and consider who it is you are about to say these harsh words to before you say them. When mercy becomes the option of choice, rather than anger, a marriage can only get better. This will prove to be less stressful for your children. As you and your spouse spend far less time fighting in front of your kids. By showing your kids how to handle marital disputes without getting easily angered, you will also be providing them with a basic understanding of how to know how to calmly deal with problems in their own future relationships.

A Bad Purchase

You just bought a brand new television for the family room. You mount the 70-inch, 4K screen on the wall and call the family in to watch a movie. You press the on button on the remote and nothing happens. To say the least, you are about to blow a gasket. Instead of getting mad, your family urges you to give customer service a call on the phone. As you dial the customer service department of the store where you bought the television, a scowl forms across your face. Your wife knows that look. She reminds you to take it easy with the customer service representative. After all, many companies rely on inbound call center solution companies instead of their own employees. Reluctantly, you relax your scowl and try to communicate with a pleasant tone. To your astonishment, the customer service rep tells you that they can have a new television out to your home within the hour, and they will install it on their dime. If you had approached this situation with anger in your voice, this may not have turned out as well as it did. As things stand, your kids give you a thumbs up for being the cool dad who made everything right.

While it is always easier to resort to anger when something does not go right, anger will generally only tend to create far more drama than is necessary to handle the majority of family problems. When you are angry, this will also tend to provoke you to say hurtful things to those people you love that you will likely regret later. To show others that you are more sophisticated than that, it is far better to consider how you might turn the situation around and use a much lighter approach to even a serious family problem. Developing this skill is one of the true signs of genuine intellect that members of all families would do good to develop.

Tim Esterdahl

Tim Esterdahl is the editor of IFCS blog. He is a married father of three and enjoys golf in his spare time.

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